I used to tell my friends that I still believed I’d eventually end up with someone that’s decent, faithful and sane. And then they laughed hysterically… until they noticed the naïve glistering of actual hope in my eyes. Then they’d give me the pitiful look.
In the past couple of months, they’ve educated me – gently yet firmly – about how things roll around here.:
- 1 to 5 (some sources even note a 1 to 8 ratio)… 1 single guy per 5 single women, that is. Guess who rules this City? It ain’t Bloomberg, people!
- Men in NYC are assholes.
- Men in NYC will screw you. First literally and then figuratively.
- Men in NYC will get your number and never call.
- Men in NYC will sleep with you and then never call.
- ‘In your 30s’ is the new ‘in your 20s’. For guys, that is. Once they hit 40 something, they might start looking to settle… with a 20 something year old. Because they can.
- He shows interest? Nice… by now he’s probably sourcing someone slightly skinnier/prettier/smarter than you. Because now he thinks he can do better.
- Is he Jewish? And you’re not? Forget it.
- You like a guy who’s 6’ tall? Hysterical laughter
But still… a minuscule pile of hope stuck in my crazy mind… until the New York Post decided to crush that as well. When an article headlines like this…
… you just know I’m momentarily busy slamming my head through a wall.
PS: the full article can be found here. Please get three bottles of Rum ready before reading.
PPS: where do you buy cats?